The Italians' black hole


Definition of priority: “to come first in relation to something else, the right to get precedence for urgency, importance, values or similar.” {translated from} Garzanti Dictionary 2006

Italy is founded on priorities. Priorities are its very foundations. Without the priority of the Mezzogiorno (South of Italy), of work, of young people, of the Mafia, and just recently of Clandestines, and of released prisoners, this country would not last 2 days. Of course a country without foundations cannot last.
Thus in Italy there are some priorities that have had priority to wait for a century. They are reverse priorities. The one that shines above the others is the SRC Salerno-Reggio Calabria.
For some time, in the Italy of high speed and Great Traffic Jams, when a motorway needs repairing or a clogged ring road needs improving, up pops the priority to be given to the Salerno-Reggio Calabria.
Already Andreotti said it when he was deputy Pharaoh. It’s been repeated by Ministers who were Christian Democrats, Socialists, Olive Party and even Emmenthal Lunardi. Even he admitted “The Salerno-Reggio Calabria is a priority especially if someone is in a hurry to get to Milan.”
Then Emmenthal got his friends to construct dozens of tunnels, while the Salerno-Reggio Calabria was still a bombed out ribbon, full of ghostly construction and abandoned work and above all with dozens of kilometers with a single lane, so much so that because of the traffic jams, it has been renamed the SRC, Strada Rottura di Coglioni {Road that Breaks Your Balls}
The SRC is 443 Kilometres long but on average it takes 8 hours to drive along it. It was due to be ready by 2008, but at the current rate it could be opened in 2036 by the new Minister of Transport Lapuccio Elkann junior.
Now the SRC has been indicated as having priority over the Bridge of Messina, otherwise known as the megalomaniacal delirium fruit of the wig of Berlusconi, the day that Dell’Utri made him a gift of a Golden Gate made from Lego.
The bridge over the Straits would be very very costly and the greatest Japanese engineer has said “yes it could hold up, if you take the sea from underneath it.”
Thus we are happy to give priority to the Salerno-Reggio Calabria. But, this time, let’s keep our eyes open.
We will check to see if there are building sites that are making no progress, if half of the motorway is one and a half lanes wide, if there are new ghostly contracts, abandoned big diggers, mountains of stones ten metres high and emergency parking places just for bicycles.
Basically if the Salerno-Reggio Calabria, amidst sections that are shut, redone or being redone seems to be a cocktail between Stalingrad and Simona Ventura, then the word “priority” will have been used to mislead us.
We will check that the SRC, Strada Rottura Coglioni {Road that Breaks Your Balls} becomes SRC, Strada Regolarmente Completata (Road Regularly Completed} with safety measures that will be above the breaking of any balls. But at least then Italy will be saved.

Posted by Beppe Grillo at 11:18 AM in | Comments (7)
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Please!!!!!!!! Not Simona Ventura, as artificial as ever in everything she says and everything she does...

About the so-called motorway... how daunting to spend so many hours on what I consider a real NIGHTMARE!! In fact, because of that very motorway, last year we decided to transport my sick baby daughter who required specialist care by air rather than going by car. It cost us a fortune renting a car for 8 weeks besides the house rent. However common sense warned us to avoid taking to the roads, particularly the Salerno Reggio Calabria because it is no joke finding yourself trapped in a road jam or some freakish incident.

Posted by: Joselle Camilleri | October 17, 2006 08:47 PM

Yes, checking the status -wow- great idea... And once we have checked that nothing has been done? What are we going to do, should we give then a vote against this Governement, maybe to Berlusconi? Sorry to sound pessimsitic, but I see no way out here, as always we can only loose.

Posted by: Harri Klein | October 17, 2006 04:30 PM

Thanks Raffaella, i wish I hadn't asked! I Googled her name and found pictures of a lady with a gigantic set of teeth that must be an impossible challenge to her plastic surgeon.

Posted by: Enrico Rossi | October 17, 2006 04:22 PM


I totally agree with your description of "L'Isola dei famosi" - it is probably one of the worst programmes on Italian TV. Mindless trash - but Simona makes a fortune from it and laughs all the way to the bank (and the plastic surgeon). That "L'Isola dei famosi" should be shown on TV is possibly as scandalous as the Salerno-Reggio Calabria almost motorway. Luckily, "L'Isola dei famosi" was not, I believe, an Italian TV invention. It's another example of copycat TV, like Grande Fratello - Big Brother. Pukevision.

Posted by: Alex R | October 17, 2006 04:16 PM

She is a Reality Show entertainer with the gift of ubiquity and plastic surgery-loving. She is hosting a great example of trashy TV called: "L'Isola dei famosi" (The Island of celebrities), IMHO may be the worst TV programs in the story of italian TV.

Posted by: Raffaella Biferale | October 17, 2006 04:02 PM

Yes Raffaella, who is Simona Ventura?

Posted by: Enrico Rossi | October 17, 2006 03:31 PM

Apart from the fact that foreign people or italians in abroad haven't the faintest idea who is Simona Ventura (and they don't miss it at all!), this post is very funny, but true!
The Salerno-Reggio Calabria motorway is a scandal!

Posted by: Raffaella Biferale | October 17, 2006 02:51 PM

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